Body Language That Creates Attraction

Body language seems to be on of those subjects that many people over look in our day to day lives. Especially when we are meeting new people and trying to leave a very good first impression. We typically try to make ourself seem little bit more important and impressive by talking about our achievements and past experiences.

You can talk about how much more awesome your life is, than it actually is. You can speak about your amazing plans and ongoings projects with more confidents, because you know, it is hard to prove that your telling the truth.

You can talk about yourself all you want, how amazing everything is in your life but if your body language does not match your talk, and won’t back it up, you will be in trouble. People will bite through your story in a second and don’t want to have anything to do with you.

Im not saying that it is good to exaggerate things about ourselves, but lets be honest, we all do it to some extent. We all like to feel important and we love when people are impressed with us. Even if our story is a little bit exaggerated. So, when we talk about ourselves we need to make sure that our body is saying the same things!

Not many people know, that we use body language aka non verbal communication to communicate 93% of the time and only 7% verbally. In the book “Silent Messages” by Albert Mehrabian. He writes that he concluded that prospects based their assessments of credibility on factors other than the words the salesperson spoke, the prospects studied assigned 55 percent of their weight to the speaker’s body language and another 38 percent to the tone and music of their voice. They assigned only 7 percent of their credibility assessment to the salesperson’s actual words.

People tend to have a lot less conscious control over non-verbal messages than what they are actually saying. So, the way you walk and move, the way you carry yourself, your posture, the tone of your voice, the facial expressions will tell people a lot more about yourself than your words do. It is a good thing to keep in mind that when you are able to read other peoples body language, so are they.

Its not difficult to start reading other peoples body languages. All you need it to do is make yourself familiar with basic’s of body language. The different signs that people give without even knowing it. You can probably already tell by looking at someone if that person is uncomfortable and defensive or happy and comfortable. But if you don’t just stop with the basics and keep learning to read body language like a pro, you would be able to read people like a book, just by looking how they carry themselves.

So how can you learn how to leave a better impression about yourself to other people? By learning the basics of body language and studying body languages of successful and confident people as well as unhappy and insecure people, you can start understanding the differences of these people’s body language, one can implement them in their life and make themselves look much more attractive. You might be wondering, isn’t this also exaggerating? If you ask me, I would say its not, you are only advertising yourself better than most people.

Here are some body language tips and advice that will make you a more attractive.

The way you carry yourself

To make yourself more attractive and confident in the eyes other people and especially the opposite sex. It is good to start with a good posture. You will stand tall with your shoulders back and chest up and hands either on the side , a good wide open welcoming stance.

Having a open stance shows that you’re comfortable and confident in any situation, which is the opposite to defensive and insecure body language like crossing your arms, hunching over and putting your hands in your pockets. Imagine how would you stand and walk when you’re proud of yourself. If you happen to not have a very good posture, don’t worry, you just need to practise.

The way you walk

Walking like a million dollars is also nothing difficult, you can use your imagination again. Imagine how would you walk when you’re happy and very proud of yourself, you’re walking tall, head held high, you’re not in a hurry, your just taking a walk. Hands on your sides, not in your pockets. Even if you are late to your awesome date, walk with confidence and with a clear direction, don’t walk too fast and not too slow. Find a sweet spot between the two.

If you’re walking with your date on the side walk, you will choose the rhythm and the pace you two are walking at, if they try to lead the walk, slow down even more so they will follow your lead, because you are the leader on your date.

Your facial expressions

Facial expressions are a big part of the body language. With facial expressions we express our feelings and thoughts, so when you’re walking tall with a slight swagger, don’t miss this chance to add to all of it with a nice smile. Smile makes a huge difference how people perceive you when you first meet them, it will tell them that you are friendly, light hearted and totally approachable.

Its the same thing with random people on the street, if you see someone looking you in the eyes, smile at them and ask how are they, this shows again that you are comfortable in your skin and will leave a great first impression.

Eye Contact

Nothing tells the other person about your self confidence more than a strong eye contact. Good, strong eye contact comes like everything else in life, with practise. Just try not to stare, this is uncomfortable and creepy for the other person you just met for the first time. A good ratio is if you keep the eye contact about 70-80% of the time when you’re talking with someone.

Try to keep it as natural as you can. Practising eye contact at first might feel strange and uncomfortable to you, but more you practice it, more natural it feels. To practice good eye contact – while you go about your day, start looking people who walk past you in the eyes.

Start looking for eye contact with strangers, if you see someone looking you in the eyes, smile to them. Very soon it will become boring for you and you can go a level higher and start talking with random strangers about random stuff. This will destroy your approach anxiety.

Body language on a date

Whether your sitting at the table or on a bar stool on your wonderful date. You always want read the other persons body language. Are they leaning towards you or leaning away, where are their legs pointing, towards you or away from you, are they sitting comfortably or in a escape position, do they look in your eyes or are their eyes wondering, do they seem nervous or bored. These things will tell you exactly whether they like you or not.

When your date is leaning in towards you, this is a good sign, it shows that they have interest in you. At the same time when they are leaning away from you, the opposite might be the case.

If you’re a man, a good idea is to lean back in your chair or seat and take up too much room with your legs open and laid back posture, show that you are comfortable in the situation and let her lean in. Don’t lean in yourself, if the music or the surrounding noise is too loud, it is a perfect opportunity to ask her to sit next to you and close the distance. Keep a strong eye contact, and speak with a calm and clear voice, ask her interesting questions about her self.

Signs that she likes you

When you’re on your date and sitting in a pub, restaurant or where ever, women will give you signs when they like you, they most likely don’t even realise that they are doing this so its pretty interesting to watch if you know what you are looking for.

Here are 15 things women do when they like you:

1. They hold a strong eye contact.
2. They laugh at your cheese jokes (or any joke).
3. They lean in to you while sitting.
4. They move closer to you.
5. They seem nervous.
6. They play with their hair.
7. They adjust their clothing and makeup (because they want to look good for You).
8. They reveal their neck.
9. They touch your arm or your body in any way.
10. They ask about your life, they are interested about you.
11. They offer to buy you a drink.
12. They smile about 70% of the time.
13. They will bump into you while walking together
14. They will change the hand they hold their purse when you two are walking (so its easier for you to take her hand)
15. They make things easy for you, they help you (like giving you their number, telling you when they are free to get together again etc.)

Of course if she’s doing none of those things, there is a good chance that inviting her out again would be a waste of your time. Remember, you always want to gauge their interest in you, always keep your eye on what they are doing rather what they are saying.